


First Time Parents

by godisthedice



Series: GW2017A [5]
Category: Shameless (US)
Genre: Canon Compliant, F/F, Gallavich Week 2017A, Kid Fic, M/M, Sickfic, Vomiting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-02
Updated: 2017-06-02
Packaged: 2018-11-08 00:43:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,919
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11070489
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/godisthedice/pseuds/godisthedice
Summary: Gallavich Week 2017A Day 5: Gallavich as parentsIt seemed like it took a year for someone to get Ian on the phone. "Mick? What's up... why's Yevgeny crying?""I don't fuckin' know. Svetlana went on a date and fuckin' left him with me. He won't fuckin' stop and he just puked on me and Svet's bein' a fuckin' bitch and..." Mickey took a deep breath. "I need you to come home.""Of course." Ian didn't even stop to think about it and Mickey had never fucking been happier that he'd hooked up with him instead of bashing his brains in. "I'll be there soon as I can."





	First Time Parents

"You and orange boy watch baby. I go with girlfriend."

"The fuck I am." Maybe Mickey had agreed that he'd do more shit with the baby if Svetlana would stop bitching about Ian living with them but he hadn't actually _meant_ it. Not when he'd just got in from work and he was fucking tired.

Svetlana was dressed up nice. Probably she and that chick she was fucking were supposed to go out dancing or some shit like that. She looked like she was thinking about putting one of her heels through his eye, too. Mickey knew that fucking look. He _did_ have a sister. Her hands were fisted on her hips while she looked down at him where he was sprawled out on the couch and finally comfortable. "Baby is sleeping. If you are not shithead and do not make loud noise buttfucking, baby will stay sleeping. You _will_ watch baby."

That was apparently fucking that. Svetlana gave him one more glare and turned around so fast Mickey wasn't sure how she didn't fucking break her ankle in those hooker shoes.

Practice, he guessed. "Ian's not even fuckin' here!"

"Then will be no noise" was all the bitch shot back at him. She was out the fucking door before he could think of a comeback.

Mickey slumped further down on the couch. "Like you get to fuckin' talk. 'Ooh, ooh... buzz tree'... fuckin' _loud_ bitches." 

At least if the baby was asleep that meant Mickey wasn't gonna have to do shit until the little fucker decided to piss himself. Mickey was lucky and he might even wait until Ian had gotten home from work and then _he_ could do it. Kid liked Ian better anyway.

Mickey had almost fallen asleep when the kid started crying.

"Fuuuuuuck." For a couple seconds Mickey thought about just letting him cry for awhile. Better than getting up.

Like he could fucking tell what Mickey was thinking, the baby picked right then to get just a little louder.

Mickey groaned and rolled himself off the couch. "Fuckin' hold on a minute." Fuck. Why didn't kids come with a fucking off switch? Or at least a mute button?

By the time Mickey got in there the kid was starting to get red in the face. "Couldn't fuckin' wait for Ian, could you? Or done this before your mom left?" All the kid did was yell some more. "Oh my god, shut up a second. What? You hungry? You wet?" Didn't smell like he'd decided to shit himself at least. Mickey wasn't fucking dealing with that.

Kid's diaper was dry. He sucked on the nipple of the bottle that Mickey made for a couple seconds before he spat it out and started wailing again. He was starting to sound kinda hoarse for a baby he'd screamed so fucking much.

"I don't know what you fuckin' want." Mickey stared down at him in his crib some more, then grabbed his phone and scrolled down his recent calls until he found the right number.

It rang enough times that Mickey was starting to think that no one was gonna pick up at all.

The noise on the other end when someone did was deafening. "What."

"Your kid's fuckin' crying."

Svetlana was shouting into the phone--Mickey held it a little away from his ear. "Is your kid tonight, shithead. You take care of crying. Is baby. Is easy. Feed, change, burp, cuddle."

"Don't you think I fuckin' tried that?" He'd tried the feeding and the changing. That was enough.

"Try again. Call if real problem."

"It _is_ a fuckin'--" 

She'd already hung up.

Mickey looked down at the baby. The baby screamed up at him.

Carefully, Mickey picked him up under his armpits and held him at arm's length for a second. Maybe he did just miss his mom or something. Mickey pulled him up against his chest and tucked his tiny head against his shoulder.

That was when the kid hurled on him.

Yeah, _fuck_ this shit.

Mickey's next call, with the kid back in his crib and his shoulder wiped off with a towel, was to 'Firecrotch - work'. "I need to talk to I--Curtis. Fuckin' family emergency."

It seemed like it took a year for someone to get Ian on the phone. "Mick? What's up... why's Yevgeny crying?"

"I don't fuckin' know. Svetlana went on a date and fuckin' left him with me. He won't fuckin' stop and he just puked on me and Svet's bein' a fuckin' bitch and..." Mickey took a deep breath. "I need you to come home."

"Of course." Ian didn't even stop to think about it and Mickey had never fucking been happier that he'd hooked up with him instead of bashing his brains in. "I'll be there soon as I can. Try holding him against your skin. Babies like that."

Didn't have to fucking ask how Ian knew that. He'd probably done it for Liam. "Yeah. Yeah, I'll... just fuckin' get here."

Mickey could hold it together until Ian got there.

By the time the front door swung open Mickey was pretty fucking sure he was about to start crying too.

He'd gotten the kid stripped down to just his diaper and laid out on his bare chest. The wailing had died down to pathetic little whimpers but Mickey was pretty fucking sure that was just because he'd wore himself out. He still managed a louder scream once in a while. When he had a chance to rest up for a little bit. Little fucker had started coughing too.

Mickey figured that the kid was probably just as relieved that Ian was there as he was. Ian picked the kid up off of Mickey and tucked him close, like it was fucking natural or something. "Hey, little man, what's the problem? Why are you making your daddy worry?"

"I'm not fuckin' worried. I'm just..." Mickey sat up and scooted over to give Ian some room. "Fuck. I just need a fuckin' break."

Any other time and Ian probably would have given him shit about it. He was frowning at the kid instead though, like he hadn't even heard Mickey. Mickey's heart felt like it skipped a fucking beat. He'd expected Ian to be fucking calm about all this. He was the one that knew what to do with the kid. He was supposed to fix this.

Ian pressed his cheek against the baby's, held it there for a second, then looked up at Mickey. "Where's the thermometer?"

"Why would we have a fuckin' thermometer?"

"I don't know, in case one of us gets sick?" Ian kept one big hand braced on the back of the kid's head. It made Mickey feel a little better that he was still crying with Ian holding him.

Made him feel a little worse too.

Mickey shook his head. "Nah man. We don't have one." Wasn't like anyone had ever needed one before. "Fuck. Is he sick?"

"Maybe." Ian pressed his cheek against Yevgeny's again. "I think so. Maybe you should try Svetlana again."

Svetlana's phone went right to voicemail. Fiona's rang until Mickey cussed it out and tossed Ian's phone down on the couch. So did Debbie's.

"Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck." Mickey shook his head. "We gotta--we gotta get him to the fuckin' doctor."

They couldn't fucking afford it but Mickey would figure it out. Wouldn't be the first doctor's bill they'd ducked. They'd... fuck. They'd use fake information or something.

Ian just nodded, frowning and quieter than he'd been for a long fucking time. Fuck. That meant he was fucking worried too. "Let's get you dressed, little man. Yeah, get a onesie on so we can take you to see the doctor, how does that sound? Can you be a brave boy for a little longer?"

Fuck. Mickey didn't know how a baby was supposed to manage that shit when _he_ wasn't.

Somehow they got the kid dressed without him hurling on anything else; Ian had to remind Mickey to put a shirt on. His shoulder still smelled like sour milk where maybe hadn't done as good a job cleaning it off as he should have, but as long as no one got too close to him... they could go fuck themselves anyway.

Yevgeny cried the whole way to the ER. Ian kept talking to him and Mickey cracked his knuckles at anyone on the L that looked like they might complain about the crying baby.

Mickey was pretty sure he yelled at someone at the ER too. Something about how his kid was fucking sick and someone had better fucking take care of it right the fuck then. Ian stayed behind him the whole time, big and solid and holding Yevgeny close as he could.

Of fucking course Yevgeny managed to fall asleep by the time they actually got back there. Just in time for the nurse to wake him up doing all that nurse shit. Hadn't looked like he was sleeping good anyway. Little guy was squirming in Ian's arms. Mickey took him back and settled him in his lap to give Ian a fucking break. Course it didn't do much fucking good when Ian put an arm around _him_ instead. Fuckin' idiot.

When a doctor finally stepped in, she was smiling. "First time parents?"

Ian spoke up before Mickey could tell her to go fuck herself. "Yeah. That obvious?"

"Everyone does it," she told him. "Good new is, this handsome little boy just has a little bit of a cold. Give him some baby acetaminophen, keep him hydrated, and if he seems uncomfortable you can give him a lukewarm bath. Come back if his fever goes over 103, but other than that he's going to be just fine."

"It's a fuckin' cold?" Mickey shook his head. "Fuck that. There's somethin' wrong, you gotta--"

Ian put a hand on his shoulder. "Thanks, doc. We'll make sure to buy a thermometer when we go get the medicine, _right_?"

"...fine." Mickey wasn't fucking convinced. If Ian was gonna go along with it though... fuck. He trusted him way more than he trusted some doctor.

According to the thermometer, the baby medicine shit knocked the kid's temperature back down to where it was supposed to be. Mickey guessed maybe the doctor knew what she was talking about this time. Another bottle and Yevgeny passed the fuck out in his crib, finally quiet.

Mickey was pretty sure he was never getting off the couch again. Especially after Ian sat down next to him after he checked on the kid one more time. The couch was worn down enough in the middle that it always threw whoever was sitting there together. Mickey didn't try to fight it. Ian wrapped an arm around his shoulders again.

"You know..." Mickey could feel Ian's smile against the side of his face. "You're pretty cute when you're doing the worried dad thing."

"Fuck you, bitch." Mickey didn't even have the fucking energy to raise a middle finger. He just settled in a little bit closer to him. "I wasn't fuckin' worried."

The smile wasn't going away. "Sure, Mick."

What the fuck ever. Mickey was just worried that Svetlana was gonna kill him in his sleep or something if anything happened to the kid while Mickey was watching him and...

Yeah. Maybe he was fucking glad that him and Ian hadn't sucked at the whole parenting thing. And that their kid was feeling better. Fuck Svetlana anyway though.

**Author's Note:**

> The Russian word that Mickey is horribly mangling in his awful Svetlana imitation in paragraph seven is:
> 
> Быстрее (Bystreye) - 'faster'


End file.
